Impossible Deadline

4th-level Finance & Cost-Cutting

Casting Time: 1 action, though the date itself was fixed on a slide months before anyone affected heard about it
Range/Area: One project or team you can perceive on a roadmap
Components: V, S, M (a launch date, and a calendar hold titled “Alignment”)
Duration: Until the deadline passes or is quietly moved, whichever the caster finds easier to admit to
Classes: VP of Product, CEO, Board

Each creature assigned to the affected project must make a Tenure saving throw. On a failed save, a creature takes 4d6 force damage at the end of each week until the spell ends, as scope is held fixed against the original timeline. On a successful save, a creature takes half damage, and the deadline is quietly renegotiated for that creature alone, though never announced as such.

This spell does not increase headcount, reduce scope, or extend the timeline by itself. It only makes the gap between them somebody else’s problem.

At Higher Levels. When cast using a spell slot of 5th level or higher, the effect extends to one additional dependent team for each slot level above 4th, each rolling its own saving throw.

Flavor: “This needs to ship by the 15th. I know it’s tight, but I have faith in this team.” — Slack message, sent to a channel, 6:47pm on a Friday